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[19 Jul 2006|12:13am] |
lifes ups and downs sometimes become to much
i hate it when theres people you'd do anything for on the snap of a finger.
And you lose them. Well i feel like i'm losing them. Or that i already did.
I hate this shit
but otherwise
tonight is raechel and I's 3 months.
She's amazing.
i love her
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| eh |
[11 Jun 2006|01:34am] |
I count down the days
To when the human mind won't be so complicated.
And i could begin to fathom why i feel the way i do
And think the way i do.
idk i'm retarded.
fathom the right word?
Don't care if i spelled it right.
Hah new music comin soon ya'll
yuuuuh
yuh hurd.
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| What we call life. |
[23 May 2006|08:58pm] |
your dependancy
on inadimant objects
is unnecessary to life
for when you cant think for yourself
you are then no one
but a product of a product
a creation of our society
a free mind is what you need
to see through all the lies
built up in time
to block our minds
from creating something more
stopping us from finding free will
to live our lives, to the absolute fullest
Its not only the drugs
but the lies
that we tell eachother
day by day
purity truly no longer exist
but in the greens
and colors of the world
nothing is real
no one is real
Who am I
Who are you
Who are we
What is this
we call it life
But i seem to think its a scam
For i really dont kno what to think
Or believe
It's so easy to be decieved
but if things are how they seem
Lost is what i truly am
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[19 May 2006|04:02pm] |
somehow my buddylist got deleted.
everyone send me their SN again plz.
or IM me.
my sn is
Family Is Blood
or eat a dick you fuckers.
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[15 May 2006|04:11pm] |
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music |
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Dance Floor Justice |
] |
Cornerstone came, and went, really fast.
but it was amazing and so was chilln with the bros
to many good times to count on 2 hands.
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[10 May 2006|07:32pm] |
Please.
just disappear, or some how allow me to be blind to you and nothing else.
fuckkkkkkkk
other than that.
today was fun
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| Stoked |
[10 May 2006|02:07pm] |
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music |
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Killing The Dream |
] |
This fuckin weekend is cornerstone.
2 days till i'm out of this fuckn county.
god i get so sick of this place and its people, most of em.
Today's early release so i'm sitting here bored, even thouggh i have work to do n Raechel is coming over in a bit.
I keep sitting here waiting for Jose to get online any minute now to talk about shit, but then i realize that its only 2 oclock.
lol
How's everyone been.
things have been turning around for me a good amount, I'm very happy.
well
i kno just about everyone that veiws this shit, so top being a damn stranger.
hit me up on AIM - Family Is Blood
myspace - www.myspace.com/fxckyouimxxx
Can't wait for mad chilln with the bros this weekend, and hopefully seeing people i haven't in a long time.
Oh by the way.. I think i'm done fightin pple, or arguing.. I'm just gunna buy a fuckn tommy gun n solve it that way.
hah
woooooord
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[07 May 2006|07:23pm] |
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I kno we're so angry
I kno i am so fucking angry
And honestly, im sick of so many people saying they're fucking ffriends.
and they're lies that come with it.
and they're bullshit
fuck you you fucking faggots, you're so fuckin lame half of you couldnt even stab a bitch in the back, you just fuckkin try.
Keep your mouth shut, although unfortunatly about 80% of the people im talkn about wont fuckin read this.
Oh and you stupid cunt that lives across teh street from me.
you could be hanging from a tree.
n id spit on it
you're a dead person to me
fuck off.
other than my rambling of hate.
srry i havent made an entry in a while
a lot of shit is back to normal, finally get to go back to school tomrrow, not suspended anymore ahah.
got a gf now, she's amazing. n not a dumb hoe like half of the fuckin stupid ass cunts around here.
Friends are chill as fuck, cornerstone is coming up n im still slackin a bit on money, hope i can get the shit togethor.
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[05 Apr 2006|08:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 content |
] |
| [ |
music |
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T.I |
] |
Been a while since i've written anything on here.
So here's some shit lol
No longer in a band, but that's that, shit didn't work out.
School's going good but the days seem to keep gettn longer.
Been chilln w/ some old friends a littl bit, But aint goin back to the old ways i refuse. Shit's different, I'm different, they're different.. No ones the same from last year.. i guess?
There's some people i was really close to about a month or so ago, That i don't mean shit to. It bothers the hell outta me. We all screw up, Especially me.. But yuh kno.. Aren't your supposed to forgive people at times, especially if they ment alot to you.. This is about several different people.
This sunday i leave to go on my 7 day cruise with my family. Should be fun i guess, cruise+spring break=lots of hoes haha
Back to the friends thing.. I miss a lot of em, a lot.. and there's some i wish i could see more no adays and be close to again.. but i also really enjoy chilln with the ones i chill with now. I hope when i come back mayb some things will be different.
My lazy ass finally got a job.. Workin at Cabana bistro n Grill in hobeSound. It's a nice ass restaurant and i work with some friends n the boss is chill as hell.
All hell breaks loose reunion show is on saturday, The day before i leave.. I hope i don't gotta work sat. and I can find a ride.
Also.. Anyone i've ever been a dick to, or friendships i fucked up.. Here's my apalogy, i'm sorry ya'll.
But this might sound a bit hipocritical, There's one dumb ass hoe tho i don't apalogize to, Wait.. no 2. But names shall not be mentioned but i don't any of you readers kno any of em anyways.
keep it real ya'll
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[24 Mar 2006|12:48pm] |
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music |
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God Damn washer machines. |
] |
Lately there's been a lot of gay shit in my life.
But it's not like things just happen. They happen for a reason and there's always an action that causes everything.
Well i fucked up with some of my real good friends. People to this moment i'd still be there for, even if it ment risking my own life.
There was currently an issue with me being kicked out of the band. I'm done saying things that don't need to be sayed.
But i was replaced from somthing i cared so much about, with people that i cared so much about. Replaced by someone i don't give a shit about. I didn't take it all the way i should, i mean i wasn't a complete bitch about it. But it pissed me off, and i opened my mouth about things that didn't need to be sayed and wheren't even a big issue yet. Which then led to some of my real good friends being kicked out of the family. Well of course i get blammed, and the more and more i think about it, a decent amount was cause of me. And for that i'm fuckin sorry. There aint shit i can do or so to anyone to change what was sayed and what happend. But i need Jose to kno that i still love him to death cause he's still part of my family. No matter what, no matter how shitty things get. I'm always gunna be there for you man, And i want you to kno i'm sorry. For real.
And to anyone that reads this, and it doesn't concern them, don't ask me questions on it. Cause if you haven't heard already from when i opened my shit, then you don't need to kno now. I'm not tryin to be a prick i'm just statin the fuckin truth.
And the warriors and blacklisted show is on sat. at Rays in downtown WP: 10 bucks.
And 772's finest hardcore band Barriers Now Bridges is playing shit starts at 6:00 everyone go.
Peace.
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| yuh |
[15 Mar 2006|07:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 blah |
] |
| [ |
music |
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baseball music |
] |
so i have a lot of things on my mind lately.
a lot of personal things, and pointless things.
idk
i need to talk to certain people more n shit.
Comeback Kid Friday, I guess the best thing this week, hopefully it doesn't ruin and make this week even shittier for me.
anyways, shit.
lol
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[10 Mar 2006|10:50pm] |
you're still the fucking same.
the end.
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| I'm tired |
[04 Mar 2006|10:54pm] |
| [ |
music |
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my surroundings. |
] |
Of many things.
So basically.
I'm sick of seeing my friends be replaced in relationships with people they care about.
Being replaced by some other person that may be an amazing person, but will seriously
never care or feel for a person nearly as much as the other. I've been seeing it a lot lately,
In my own life, in aquaintances lifes, and friends lifes.
There's a certain dozen or so people i truly care about. And 2 more than any of the others.
One of those people i'm ridiculously closed to is my cousin and bestfriend jose. The kids
fucking amazing, and crucial, hence why he has the nickname. I don't kno where i'd be this
very freakin second if it wheren't for him. His and I's friendship is more than i could ask for.
I also, for a very logn time had another friend, that i cared for just as much. Things where amazing aswell
something somewhere along the lines went wrong. It seems like everything we've ever established, sayed etc.
is gone. It feel's like we're complete strangers.Which is gay as fuck cause i've had some of the best times
of my life with this grl. But this is where i feel replaced. Where ever the crack between our lives where,
it spread and grew bigger. And it seems like it stretched so wide that we need to build a 100 mile long bridge
to gap the distance and make things right.
I don't only see this in my life, but also some of my other close friends lives.
It's ridiculous and makes no sense. I don't understand life, or other people sometimes. People's motives and
situations, Minds and hearts. At one point i did but the point is in the past.
Recently i'd just like to give up on a ton of things. And once nothing matterd, But now it seems like every
little thing matters. And i hate it with every single bit of my soul.
merr herr
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[04 Mar 2006|08:35pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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chipper |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Nova Acoustic. |
] |
Hahahah
this has been an interesting day.
its ending with me sitting in laines room with Kraft, Kristi,laine playing acoustic,lmao this is hilarious, jose and Josh nova and some hoe.
This is kind of a fun night.
The show tonight in vero was gay as fuck im not going to lie it was patheitic.
I was freakin 2-steppn to this gay ass band and fuckin stepped on my thumb somehow while dancin. SHIT HURTS.
Tonight us d00ds in the car after the show talked about some fun funny shit, good conversations and laughs.
We all wish girls wheren't so confusing and whatnot. Gotta love em n hate em.
What the fuck ever, josh just gave me a kiss on the cheek wtf is goin on! lmao.
well
im bored.
holla.
oh, fuckin FCAT on monday and tuesday www00000hhhh00000000 NOT
fuckin a'.
<33333
n people need to cheer up.. when you're havin a hard time lettn your head fall won't help at all.
i've learned.
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[23 Feb 2006|04:50pm] |
things are starting to get interesting.
shit.
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[23 Feb 2006|04:50pm] |
things are starting to get interesting.
shit.
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[18 Feb 2006|11:57am] |
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Yeaah so im hittin up ocala tonight with some of the bros and kristi.
Shits gunna be way fun, goin to the dank ass show up there.
Anchors away(STOKED)
KLU
The Red Baron
ADTR and maylene.
Shits gunna be so fuckin fun.
My boy Tmoney is back in town so this weekend is going to consist of some crucial chilln time.
the past week has been ok for me im still highly tired and stressed out but w.e thats life.
From the words of Guns up! "suck it up and deal with it" that's what i've been doin and takin all my friends advice.
Ya'll are amazing and i wanna thank you for everything everyone of you has done for me since we've met.
Everyone keepit real and just try to have as much fun as us tonight.
Don't think you will tho.
Peaceee
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| hahha |
[11 Feb 2006|02:02pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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Chilln |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Young Jeezy |
] |
word.
So.
I sayed something i didnt think i could do.
but now it was easier than i thought.
I sayed goodbye.
Something that i dont say unless i mean it, like other things.
Word. haha
i feel good right now to be quite honest.
Hows everyone else doin?
this week that just happened sucked. but everything happens for a reason, I wont dare forget it.
Sorry for the shit i put anyone through.
We all kno shit happens tho.
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| There's a last time for everything |
[10 Feb 2006|03:21am] |
this is the last time i leave my self open
If you kno me, you kno me
If you think you kno me, you think you kno me
If you dont kno me, You're not getting to kno me.
I appreciate that people are trying to help me.
But the only person that can help me throug what i'm going through is myself and god.
But thanks everyone for the some kind of support you've showed me.
I told her from the jump she was too good for me, but she ignored it and said no matter what she'd adore me, and if I ever worried she'd assure me with a hurry we were perfect for each other, then things got blurry, but it was too late I gave my heart
away with sencerity and when she left I guess she couldnt see the severity, for 6 months we would see each other when we could except for when i'd record or I was out on tour, then her life got rough and she didn't want my support, I guess she didn't need me anymore and broke for the door, and I tried to move on but I was dying inside, I kept a straight face and lied, told all my friends I was fine, but I was sitting uneasy because I didnt know why she just up and said bye and left my mind a crash site. The love of my life packed a poisonous bite, I never noticed you were heartless until that night, thats right.
Now I reflect I see that you were defective, heart ripped from my chest learning valuble lessons, if your capable of that then im glad you got the steppin I don't need you. I thought i did but you aint worth the stressing
Did I not treat you well enough? What the fuck did I do? I would have given you the world if you wanted me to, what do I get in return, a fucking email that says your busy, things are shitty, and how our relationship failed. You didn't seem to care, brushed it off like hair, and you made it quite clear that we were over for real, but it was only a matter of time I seen it coming from a mile away, but you should have given us a second chance before you strayed. Now today I stand here heartless because you stole it, broke it, and tossed it in the garbage, and now i see what your mom did to you cause you did it to me, I hope you notice that too. I would have waited while you got your life straightened out but instead I just wasted half a year to get erased now. You should have never led me on to think that this was gonna last, so go ahead and burn our pictures its a thing of the past.
I'm moving on and my hearts still torn but after this song you wont exsist to me anymore.
Overcome, Stand Tall Stand strong.
Live you're fucking live.
I'm now going to live mine. I'm back to my old self but with some improvements. And some more knowledge.
Things will not be the same.
I will not be the same.
I'm sorry to anyone ive taken any of my w.e the fuck this is out on. I'm not meanin to, It's just coming out, Cause truly at the time i just dont fucking care.
This is interesting.
Reign Of terror.
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[02 Feb 2006|06:31pm] |
you really are all the fukin same.
fuck
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